The Hope to Endure

"Hear my prayer, O Lord, and give ear unto my cry; hold not thy peace at my tears: for I am a stranger with thee, and a sojourner, as all my fathers were. O spare me, that I may recover strength, before I go hence, and be no more"
(Psalm 39: 12-13)

As I contemplate life, and my purpose in it, the more and more I know that my calling is to become like Jesus Christ.

The more sure I am of the missionary work that he has in store for me.

My friend Daniel got baptized today.

He called me afterward, and told me thank you. He thanked me for having the courage to introduce him to the church and the missionaries, he was grateful that he followed Christ and is experiencing the happiness of now being a part of his church.

I have a friend Masaki, and he said "By hearing my story, I want people to think about Christ, not me. I want them to realize that they can keep going and not because of me but because of Heavenly Father."

And that's so true. Daniel thanked me, because if it weren't for me, he wouldn't have heard about the church this summer, or have gotten baptized today. But, if it weren't for Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, I wouldn't have even been there.

I think the most important thing in life, is becoming as Christ would.

It's moments like these that make me know with a surety, that God is on my side, and my goal to become like Christ can be reached with their help.

God gives me hope.

I emailed Missionary President's wife in Arizona. I asked her about the bike situation. Everyone in the Arizona Tempe mission are required to ride bikes, and the price of the bike they recommended with everything that was necessary (head light, reflector, helmet, bike lock, etc.), was getting expensive. I have saved money for my mission. But I didn't save money for a bike, and a camelbak(which is also required), and for Temple Garments, and everything else included for a mission.

The bike was by far the most overwhelming task.
The mission president found me a sister missionary who is leaving in December and is willing to sell her bike to me.
I contacted her this morning to discus the prices.

She started crying and told me how happy she was that I was going on a mission, and that she knows how many people I will bless and how she is so grateful that I made the choice to join the church and serve a mission.

She cried, I cried, two complete strangers, one a phone call, crying together. Crying with Christ.

She told me she does not want to sell it, but she wants to give it to me. She told me that if she gives it to me, all she wants from me, is that I will give it my all, and I will do my very best that I can on my mission.

I started crying more, she cried more too.

Sometimes you don't realize how mindful God is of you and your situation.
I truly didn't realize how much God has been watching out for me.

I sometimes think that I'm alone in this, and that I consistently feel like I have to figure it all out alone, but God consistently proves me wrong. And he shows me over and over that all my needs will be taken care of.

I went to the temple today.
It was a blessing.
I got baptized for people who were not able to be baptized on this earth.
And it was beautiful.

In the temple, there are twelve Ox, they represent the 12 tribes of Israel(or the 12 sons of Jacob.) We are all a part of those tribes. And slowly but surely, we are being brought back together into the big loving family of Heavenly Father.

We were scattered, all about the earth, but now we can all rejoin Christ and God in his Heavenly Kingdom.

The work of missionaries is real, I'm doing it, you're doing it, we are all doing it, when we act in Christ each and every day of our lives.

I know that Christ is my savior. I know that God is mindful of me.
I know it. I know it more than I know the english language. I know it more than the back of my hand. I know it more than I know that my name is Libbie Rose Poirier and it's printed on my birth certificate.
I know it's true. I can't deny that. I just truly know it. 

In the sacred name, of Jesus Christ, this is his church, and he is hastening the work,

Amen. 

(Daniel Rossback- He got baptized today! October 17, 2014.)

I wasn't just a number

I was somebody.

I am a child of God.

As preparing for my mission, I watch and prepare and see what I need to do to be a missionary.

It hits me so hard every single time I watch this missionary work.

I told my friend today:

I never realized how big a part I was for the missionaries. And how all the missionaries care so much for those they teach. My name wasn't just on a list. I was discussed, I was talked about.

My needs, my wants, my desires, my purposes, meant something to them. They wanted to help me. I wasn't just on a list. I was planned and prepared for with every single missionary that I met with.

They spent countless hours saying my name, praying to the Lord, asking God, what they should teach me.

I used to think that missionary work was random or just completely the same for everyone. I used to think, that the first lesson I received, was the exact same as someone else. Or that all the lessons followed were as the order they were supposed to be and the lesson they were told to teach me.

It wasn't like that. The missionaries wrote my name down, and then talked about me. They talked about my progress, they talked about where I was at in life. They talked about what I might have concerns for. They talked about my weaknesses, they talked about what they can best do, to help me.

They made a plan for me, they made a plan for what they would teach me. And they did it, they reached me as Christ would.

They loved me as Christ loved those he served.

I wasn't just some number or another investigator of the church.

 I was a person.
I was a child of God to them. 

I cannot even comprehend how emotional I will be when I become a missionary. I see the effort, and each and every time I see it, I realize how much effort and love and care was put into me. How much the missionaries did and sacrificed, in order for me to learn, and to feel the holy spirit.

They not only taught me, but they fasted for me, and they fasted for my family. They fasted for my baptism, they prayed night and day for me, and when we had lessons, they prayed with me. They put me in their emails home, they wrote about me to their family. They asked their family and friends to pray for me. They asked God to give me strength, to help me change, to help me reach my goals of baptism and growing closer to Jesus Christ.

They truly cared.
They truly loved.
They truly are the Followers and Disciples of Jesus Christ.

Missionaries are real, they wear that name tag for a reason. 

They are truly representatives of Jesus Christ.

And they helped me grow closer to Christ, through their efforts, and service, while teaching me.
And they helped me become baptized, to grow and continue in faith towards my Savior, Jesus Christ.

(My Baptism in a river, with Missionary: Elder Decker) 

In Jesus' beautiful and Sacred name,

Amen.

Never Alone

Being alone is sad,
but an even worse feeling, is being surrounded by people, and still feeling alone.

It makes me wonder how the Savior felt, knowing that everything he was going through, that no one understood, no one could understand. He was utterly alone.

He didn't have a shoulder to cry on, he didn't have a brother to call, or his best friend by his side. He walked his path alone, he took the cross alone, he died for all of us, alone. 

He did all this, so that we wouldn't have to feel alone.
So that when we go through our trials that are one on millionth or kazillionth of what he's gone through, that we don't have to feel alone.

Because our Savior understands, our Savior knows.

It's really hard feeling sad. Searching your contact list, looking to see if you could find one person who may understand just exactly what you're going through.

Life wasn't meant to be hard, but it also wasn't intended to be easy.

We knew the challenges we would face, we knew how hard it was going to be.
We knew how this earthly world would treat us when we came down here,
but we still decided to come.

It makes me wonder, what did I know then, that I don't know now, that proves to me,
that all these struggles and trials on this earth are worth it.

Are worth the blessings and the thanksgivings we get in Heaven.

Whatever we had in the pre-mortal life before this, wasn't nearly as much as the potential we have in the life to come.

Apparently, it's worth it.

And even though it's hard, we don't have to do it alone.

Our Savior is with us, every step of the way.

I may not have a shoulder to cry on, or a hand to hold, or just someone to hold me tight till my tears go away,

but I do have Christ, and he cares, and he understands,

And he'll be with me, even when I feel like no one else is.

I'm grateful for that. I'm truly blessed.

Thank you Jesus,
Thank you my Savior,
thank you for never abandoning me,
thank you for helping me.
Thank you for never given up.

In Jesus' Name,
-Amen